False burden bearing involves carrying a false responsibility in relationship to someone. It can often start off with a good intent and healthy motives, but can turn sour, where there is no longer an ability to release the cares and weight of the other person’s problem. The false burden bearer loses the ability to release the situation unto the Lord.
A false-burden bearer can begin wanting another person’s wholeness more than they do. Their lives can begin to revolve around a another’s sickness or dysfunction, where they find themselves constantly thinking about the problematic person. Meanwhile, the false-burden bearer begins to lose who they are and falls into deep trenches of burnout.
False-burden bearing can occur with a family member, a friend, someone in ministry. Any relationship can come under this trap if we don’t how to operate in healthy love.
The Woes of False Burden Bearing
In addition to the people-pleasing manifestations, false burden bearers add more tension to the mix, keeping people bound in unhealthy and ungodly practices.
- Instead of properly helping others carry the burden you actually do all the carrying for them.
- What you give out is followed up with a demand for more from you that never ends.
- You end up wanting people’s freedom more than they do. This paves the way for classic false burden bearing. When this occurs for too long, you end up with codependency.
- You lose sight of who God really wants you to help and focus on.
- You become totally immersed in a guilt-ridden life.
- You do things out of feeling sorry for someone, not true compassion.
- Over time, you will become bitter over your “lot in life.”
Question: What makes false-burden bearing hard to break in life?