Why Do We Avoid Our Father?

Masses of believers have accepted Christ but are avoiding the Father. Why do we keep avoiding Father God, especially when we are His kids?

God says you have received adoption to be a child of God.

You received the Spirit of Adoption by whom we cry out, “Abba, Father.” 
Romans 8:15

How do we know we have truly received this adoption? The next part of the verse gives us the litmus test to show if we really carry this understanding. Knowing about something of God is worthless unless it starts to manifest in our life.

The proof that shows we have received the spirit of adoption is that we are able to cry out loud Abba, Father.

Abba is an intimate expression in relating to God, and He gave us the privilege of using it to speak to Him. Abba is a deeper word here than just father. In the language of this passage, father here is the formal word, but Abba is a more intimate expression.

Abba means Daddy.

It is the first name a child says to their paternal figure. A baby does not cry out “father” as part of his or her first words; it is almost always “Daddy!” Just as this is an important title to use for a baby, it is eternally significant for us to know how to cry out to our Heavenly Daddy.

Abba is an intimate expression in relating to God, and He gave us the privilege of using it to speak to Him. Yet even though God’s Word tells us to call God Daddy, there is a real problem with people being comfortable with this expression. I encounter people all the time that get uneasy with the concept of God and Daddy. I used to be in this boat. It felt sacrilegious to call God, Dad. Something in my gut had a hard time with it, so I justified it away for years. Yet the Scriptures tell teach us to call Him this.

But for so many, this doesn’t flow freely through them. The Spirit of adoption has not had a deep work in their life and they are uncomfortable with what adoption brings because they did not receive a proper foundation from their earthy dad.

It is very challenging for many, even Christians, to relate to Father God or Daddy. It is the reason so many have very fruitless walks with God. They may know Jesus and it is possible that they have even accepted Jesus Christ for salvation, but they never took the deeper step of drawing near to the Father. This level of intimacy is too hard because of the roots of rejection, fear and condemnation that keep them from that freedom.

I have noticed that most Christians can relate to Jesus fairly easy, but that is really the first step; Jesus actually came to show us the Father so we could relationally know Daddy. So why do masses of Christians call out to Jesus, while still avoiding the Father in their prayers, petitions and spiritual journey?

Everything Jesus did pointed back to the Father. All prayer is commanded to be given to the Father. Power from the Holy Spirit is the promise of the Father. Yet we avoid Him every day in our dialogue.

99% of Christians I interact with start off their prayers like this . . .

“Dear Jesus, I ask you to . . .”

“Lord, would you heal . . . ”

“I need you Jesus to . . . ”

“I ask you Jesus to . . .”

Even though prayer from the Scriptures is taught, “our Father.”

Every Scripture of prayer and intimacy points to the Father . . . in Jesus name.

In fact, Jesus spoke of His ascension and said:

And in that day you will ask Me nothing. Most assuredly, I say to you, whatever you ask the Father in My name He will give you. John 16:23

Jesus said we should ask Him nothing! Why? Because He wants you to go to the Father in His name as an adopted child of God who is loved by your Father. Jesus also said, “I will not pray the Father for you.”

This is one of the most violated verses in the Bible. Jesus was saying that as far as petition goes, we are need to ask Jesus for nothing. Instead, we need to go to the Father, through the name of Jesus. In other words, the fulfillment of what Jesus came to do involves us as believers having intimacy with the Father.

So why do we ask for Jesus to do things in our lives when He told us to ask Him nothing? The reason is because we are still uncomfortable with approaching the Father. Our own father issues block our understanding of Father God, never mind calling God Daddy.

Our own father issues block our understanding of Father God. It seems inappropriate or sacrilegious to call God Daddy and approach Him with that much freedom. Some are so bound that it seems way too casual.

I know for years as a worship leader, I would never sing the songs that used the word Daddy, in reference to God. I failed to admit my uncomfortability came out of brokenness as I hid behind religious rhetoric; believing it was borderline blasphemous to call God that. God had to heal that in me.

The reality is that our hearts are broken in our Father lens. We have been subtly bought over with lies coming from rejection that keep us from the incredible spiritual strength that comes by knowing our Daddy.

The moment I made the shift to go the higher level and address my Father, everything shifted. As I began to exercise confidence to my Abba, my Dad, my Papa . . . . everything in my spiritual walk shifted.

Could it be that your spiritual walk is stagnant because you are asking Jesus to do something you need to go to the Father about? Something to think about . . .

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Mark DeJesus has been equipping people in a full time capacity since 1995, serving in various roles, including, teaching people of all ages, communicating through music, authoring books, leading and mentoring. Mark's deepest love is his family; his wife Melissa, son Maximus and daughter Abigail. Mark is a teacher, author and mentor who uses many communication mediums, including the written word, a weekly radio podcast show and videos. His deepest call involves equipping people to live as overcomers. Through understanding inside out transformation, Mark's message involves getting to the root of issues that contribute to the breakdown of our relationships, our health and our day to day peace. He is passionately reaching his world with a transforming message of love, healing and freedom. Out of their own personal renewal, Mark and Melissa founded Turning Hearts Ministries, a ministry dedicated to inside out transformation. Mark also founded Transformed You, a communication platform for Mark’s teachings, writing and broadcasts that are designed to encourage people in their journey of transformation. Mark and Melissa currently live in Connecticut.

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  • Lee Woodward

    This is a great article! Loved your insights and revelations! I’ve heard this topic preached before, but I get so refreshed when I revisit this. I have no problems with being intimate with Father God, but after reading this article I sat down for a couple minutes and started to say out loud the words ”Daddy” and ”Papa” just to see what they sounded like. Haha. It felt good! Really good!

    • Thats amazing Lee! Thanks so much for sharing this. I remember interacting with you and you had such a special heart and sweet spirit about you. I am sure many are being blessed just to be in relationship with you. Keep spreading the love of our Papa!