Do you live with a looming question hanging over your life: “Am I in trouble?” Maybe it hits when your pastor says, “Can I talk to you for a minute?” or when a letter shows up in the mailbox, or when a friend goes quiet. In this video, I want to explore how a punishment-based relationship with God shapes the way you relate to the people around you, and how that same lens was often formed by the relationships you grew up with.
I share what I’ve observed over decades of pastoral ministry and one-on-one coaching, along with what I’ve had to work through in my own healing journey. We’ll look at why so many of us hold people at a distance, feel nervous around authority figures, assume hardship means God is punishing us, avoid asking for help, and struggle to receive a simple compliment or act of kindness. I also talk about why correction without connection wounds us, why fear-based leadership may get quick results but never builds lasting fruit, and how some of us end up passing punishment on to our kids and the people we lead.
But I don’t want to leave you stuck in the problem. I close by sharing what we need to move forward, including the reparenting work God does in us as the perfect Father and a powerful look at 1 John 4. If you’ve been bracing for the hammer to fall in your relationships with God and people, my prayer is that this teaching helps you start saying yes to love.
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