How to Be Miserable and Stay Miserable

It is very subtle thought that if our life circumstances were better, we would be better. We think our spiritual, mental and physical health would improve if only our circumstances would improve. But there is a value that only overcomers realize: every obstacle and difficulty is our chance to grow and conquer.

But if you want to stay stuck live and keep feeling miserable, there are easy ways to do it. Millions of people accomplish this every day by living in certain patterns that drag them away from a hope-filled joyous experience. Most of the time, it keeps them stuck in the same conditions, with little change in their personal growth.

1. Stay Focused on Your Negative Circumstances

The difference between an overcomer and those who remain stuck is how they deal with negative circumstances. If you want to stay miserable, then focus on how bad your situation is. Make sure its the highlight of your discussions with friends.

Now let me be clear, I do not advocate shoving down your problems. I am a huge advocate for talking out our pain, confessing our issues and working through them with close allies. But sometimes we simply need to shift our perspective and set our eyes on what God can do in any situation.

2. Ask God to Rescue You Without Taking Action

This habit doesn’t seem unproductive at first. We cry out to God for help in time of need, that’s biblical right? But many make the subtle mistake of wanting God to change their circumstances without making the brave decisions to step out and make changes and establish new habits.

3. Think Only About Yourself

Challenging life circumstances can lead us to focus on the problems so much, all we think about is ourselves. A kingdom of self develops, where we narrow in on how we feel, what we are going through and how every situation affects us. Beward of your problems keeping you from seeing the assignment God has you on to serve and bless people.

4. Don’t Forgive

In decades of serving and helping people, it has shocked me over and over again how much Christians ignore the need to forgive people. We get so easily caught into holding things against others, but we wonder why we are in torment ourselves. We drank the poison into our own body, expecting the other person to be harmed.

5. Take Everything Personally

If you want to touch people’s lives and make a difference, you’re gonna have to laugh at yourself and not take everything people say so seriously. With social media now in our midst, it brings out a lot of people who can say really mean things. With one click of a button, they forget how damaging their words can be to someone. Problem is, you’ll stay miserable if you focus in on how everyone acts and treats you in life.

6. Be a Control Freak

I have learned in life that the only thing I am in control of is my attitude and choices. I cannot control anything and anyone. The more I learn that, the more freedom and healing I enter into on a regular basis. Quite often the most stressed people are the most controlling people. They waste their energy and resources on making sure people are conforming to their expectations.

7. Do Only What Makes You Comfortable

Dynamic breakthrough is reserved for the risk takers. You cannot complain about not seeing breakthrough if you have been living in spiritual passivity. faith requires risk. Those who step into overcoming their circumstances learn they constantly need to take risks. You have to step out of the boat. Its uncomfortable, but that’s where God is.

8. Believe the Negative Story About Your Life

Everyone lives with a narrative playing in their mind about their life. Its based on the personal beliefs and perspectives that you carry. It becomes a lens on life. You need to understand that your brain cannot always determine what is real and true and what is not. If you believe its true, your body will respond to this perceived truth. If you believe your life stinks, your body will hear that and believe its true.

9. Do Not Take Care of Your Body

Christians have become notorious for overindulgence. We’ve neglected proper nutrition and physical activity for far too long. This has to be broken and changed. Many of the foods we eat, combine with inactivity are causing our bodies to become toxic. The drugs found in processed food and sugar-ladened treats are immediately altering our chemistry. We pray, asking God to help us shift our mood, while we sabotage that prayer by how we treat our bodies. Getting proper sleep, having healthy activity and eating foods that serve your health are all critical to daily mental health.

10. Question Everyone’s Motives

It’s a complete waste of brain space. Many mistake their suspicious and judgmental perspectives as discernment. Meanwhile, a lot of energy is wasted, focusing on what people may be up to.

In helping people breakthrough, I remind them of this simple truth: other people are not thinking all day about how to destroy you. In fact, people are not thinking about you all the time. I am not saying this to be mean, but to help you stop wasting your time thinking about the evil other people are doing.

11. Continue Talking Negatively About Yourself and Others.

The number one way you can pull yourself out of a miserable state is by shifting your words. You immediately put your chemical state into a new direction by using empowering statements to overcome. Statements like, “God loves me. I love myself. I have what it takes today to overcome” is a great place to start. But if you want to stay miserable, keep complaining and talking negatively about your life and people around you.

Question: There are many more I can add to this list. What would you add?

How to Be Miserable and Stay Miserable

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Mark DeJesus has been equipping people in a full time capacity since 1995, serving in various roles, including, teaching people of all ages, communicating through music, authoring books, leading and mentoring. Mark's deepest love is his family; his wife Melissa, son Maximus and daughter Abigail. Mark is a teacher, author and mentor who uses many communication mediums, including the written word, a weekly radio podcast show and videos. His deepest call involves equipping people to live as overcomers. Through understanding inside out transformation, Mark's message involves getting to the root of issues that contribute to the breakdown of our relationships, our health and our day to day peace. He is passionately reaching his world with a transforming message of love, healing and freedom. Out of their own personal renewal, Mark and Melissa founded Turning Hearts Ministries, a ministry dedicated to inside out transformation. Mark also founded Transformed You, a communication platform for Mark’s teachings, writing and broadcasts that are designed to encourage people in their journey of transformation. Mark and Melissa currently live in Connecticut.

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